It is easy to write about, and I know many people do, but how many of us who write have experience of the things we write about? I thought it was time to share my credentials in the trusting God department.
As mentioned in an earlier blog, my husband and I ‘lost’ a teenage son. He committed suicide after a string of things going wrong in his life. Some of the kids in the High School where he was bullied came to his funeral… but we didn’t know much at that time. We were in shock. The mother of the girlfriend who ‘dumped’ him that day, contacted us; wanting us to reassure her daughter we didn’t blame her. There were a lot of people we did not blame, nor did we blame God.
Walking through the valley of the shadow of death…
That line from the 23rd psalm took on a different meaning as we struggled through, supporting each other. And this is something we are so grateful to God for… if anything we grew closer together. (Through the Compassionate Friends Organisation, we met so many people who had lost their marriage, as well as a child.)
“Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Eccl 4: 12
We asked God to be the third cord in our marriage. There were times when we believed that it was that third cord that kept us from falling.
God was our strength through my husband’s many illnesses… some caused by the medication used to treat his lung condition.
No, we did not float through it all, spiritually sound, mature and well-balanced, we had many ups, downs and crashes… but our beliefs remained, although like flickering candles sometimes.
Because of his recurring health problems, my husband had to retire early and go on a disability pension.
If you have not been through it, you probably would not understand, but the change from being employed to being a ‘pensioner’ was a hugely difficult adjustment for him to make. He became quite depressed, but quietly so.
Perhaps I was out doing the shopping at the time; I know I wasn’t home when the minister called. When I came home my husband told me what the minister said he needed to do in order to turn things around. “Praise God.”
Praising God would not give him his health back; would not give him his job back…
One day he started. No, he did not have a miraculous healing but slowly the depression started to lift.
It is a long climb back from the bottom of the pit of despondency, with many slips on the way… but he made it.
Again, our marriage strengthened, the third cord held us firm and safe.
Next week… more trials, more triumphs.
Tread softly, you may be treading on someone’s dreams.